Healing our trauma based responses
Our trauma based responses are easy to recognise because they tend to show up in how we relate to those around us. They show up as our insecurities, our frustrations, intimacy obstacles and make us competitive, fearful, and approval seeking.
The core of the experience of these issues is that they are self protective, at least they intend to be and they can feel necessary in standing up for ourselves and getting our needs met. However the negative consequence is that fear & self defensiveness can prevent us from making the connections with people that we wish for ourselves. We can feel frustrated and lonely even if we have a partner and close friends.
Getting to know how trauma has affected us is the key to unlocking our authentic self. We may be aware of the major trauma we have experienced as these experiences tend to stand out. However, subtle but consistent trauma can be harder to notice because it is often normalised in our environment and we develop highly efficient defences to deal with it. These defences can escape our attention because they tend to be largely unconscious.
Every healing journey starts with connection to Self. And getting to know and acknowledge the trauma we have experienced is the first step to finding better ways to handle when we get triggered.